Dear college students everywhere.

I am Mike Birbiglia and I am a comedian. If you bring me to your school, I promise I will make you laugh and then eat at your local Applebee's. I enjoy the Riblets as well as the Fiesta Lime Chicken. I also like the Presidente Margarita and the Sizzling Apple Pie. In addition, I also enjoy the Bourbon Street Steak and the Nachos Nuevos.

Love,
Mike

P.S. Call Kate Magill. Her number is 212.268.9764. Her email is k.magill@worldnet.att.net. She'll put the wheels in motion. Or at least she'll buy some wheels. Something will happen with wheels.